7 Tips to Help You Deal When Bae Moves Farther Away

Long distance relationships are hard as they are, so what happens when one of the parties involved moves farther away instead of moving closer?

So, Bae has done it again. Pissed you off, made decisions without you, and he's playing with your future. But this time, it's a fucking mess. He's moving even farther away from you leaving you like:

Don't kill him just yet. Here are seven things you can do to help with that extra mile - or a hundred - away.

1. Calm Down

The first thing to do is clam down. It's not pleasant to hear bae is moving farther away instead of closer like you've been wanting for the past year (or two), but nothing good can happen from acting out too soon. Clear your head, take a walk, take a bubble bath, take your dogs to the doggie park, get a hot coffee at your favorite shop, call your best friend, go snowboarding, get a massage - whatever helps clear your head. Do it. You'll feel so much better. At any rate, making a decision with a clear head is better than ending up in jail.

2. Evaluate

So he's moved away to a town that's even farther away from you for work (or school) and it couldn't be helped, now what? Whether your boo moved away for an impossible to get job, or for helicopter school, he still didn't move closer to you and that's hard to admit, hard to accept and hard to deal with. So, instead of losing your shit, evaluate the situation.

Decisions had to be made and he's made them. Chances are they weren't easy to make, so instead of breaking it off because he could've moved to you, take into account the reason for the move. Maybe that helicopter school is the best or specializes in what he really wants to do. Maybe their helicopter is new and with more capabilities than the ones available close to you. Maybe that job is the best move for him and his future. And yours, too. Don't lose your shit. Evaluate the situation and act accordingly.

3. Have a Serious Talk

Nothing is scarier than getting that "We should talk" text, but for this one, it's needed. Have a serious talk and discuss the reasons for the move. Chances are bae is also feeling guilty about the move and needs to talk it out, too. Moving is always hard. It means he is leaving his job, his friends, and his physical support system. It's hard on him too, and will need to talk it out with you. He'll be besides himself when he finds out the text was really to talk it out and not break it off. Play with him a little, you deserve it.

4. Discuss Consequences of the Move

If bae thought just one "We need to talk" text was warranted for this one, he was so fucking wrong. Do it to him again, scare him a little, and when you finally sit down and get him one on one (on the phone or FaceTime), let him have it. You know why he chose to move, now you both need to understand the consequences of the move. You know what it's like to be long-distance. You know all the hard work is goes into it, and just because he has a new job or school doesn't mean he gets to play BlackOps instead of calling you. Consequences. He moves, he works harder, you're happy.

5. Discuss Expectations

Bae will be in a different city, which means he'll meet different people Many of which will be of the opposite sex. You know how difficult it is to know he's met someone new (yes, jealousy and it's snakey head), and now that he'll be in a whole different city, chances are he'll be meeting new people. Discuss the expectations of the move, the possibilities of meeting someone new, and the chances of that happening. No one wants to break up, and trust has to be strong to survive a long-distance relationship. Make your expectations clear, hear his out, and meet in the happy middle like most everything else you do together. If that means he has to call you every hour on the hour, so be it.

6. Plan Visits

Nothing beats the little jealous snake on the head better than a visit. So whether you can see him first or if he can, plan a visit as soon as possible. Mending a hurt heart (because of the unexpected move) can be the antidote to a breakup and to a bruised ego, so go pack your bags and get ready to sight see in a new city because you deserve it.

7. Make it Work

You know how to make it work. You've held on to this relationship because it feels like the real thing, it feels like he's the one. You know how to make it work with him, he knows how to make it work with you. So keep doing just that. There's only a few more miles between you and the love of your life, so pick your battles and make it work. The months will fly by, and pretty soon you'll have a helicopter pilot as a boyfriend, and isn't that the shit?

#relationshipadvice #love #truelove #loveandromance #longdistancerelationship #longdistancerelationshipadvice #loveanddistance #moving #whattodowhenyourboyfriendmoves #whattodowhenyourgirlfriendmoves #howtodealwithyourboyfriendmoving #howtodealwithyourgirlfriendmoving #howtodeal #dealingwithamove #significantother